I have a boyfriend and didn’t even know it

I have a boyfriend and didn’t even know it

So I’m not sure where to start. There’s a lot of back story from about 10 or so years ago.

So I know this person from mutual friends. Let’s call him John. I met John at a party with my cousin. We all talked about Harry Potter and nerdy stuff. Anyways I thought he was kinda weird but didn’t think much of it because he moved to California from another state and thought maybe he was just trying to fit in.

A few years had past and I run into him at a bar. He was there with his roommate who is like a brother to me. He was talking about this party we met at and was telling people that he and I hooked up. I’m like “umm I think you must have me confused with someone else,” then he was like, “maybe.” Trust me, I would never hook up with him. He isn’t my type!!

So anyways I move to another state for a few years and then moved back to California. I get a message on Facebook and it’s John asking how I’ve been and if I’m still talking to anyone out here. Not thinking too much of it I tell him no I haven’t. I’ve just been to myself and there’s no need for me to go out and do anything because I don’t drink anymore. I would rather stay home with my kids.

In September of last year I got a new job at a better salon. At this point John is my friend on all my  social media accounts. He messaged me on snapchat and said he referred his cousins girlfriend to me to get her haircut. I thanked him for that.

Then things started to get weird. He would send me  pornographic pictures on Snapchat with the Snapchat filters. It wasn’t just 2 or 3, there was about 15 of them. I messaged him and told him that was very inappropriate because my kids like to use my snapchat and I didn’t want them seeing that stuff. He said sorry and wouldn’t do it again. The next week he comes in to get his hair cut by me. He was talking with my coworker and myself about his guns, showing us pictures and bragging about all this money he is making with his gun orders. Then he started talking about how I mean the world to him. I’m thinking to myself, “dude I’ve only met you maybe 3 times in my life.” My coworker said that he gave her the creeps and he was staring at me all weird and creepy!!! But I’ve cut his hair a few times after that.

Then again that night at 3am he was sending me those damn snapchats again. With a message since it’s night your kids won’t see them!!! I told him to never send me stuff like that ever again!!

Then just before Christmas he came in for a haircut. He invited my kids and I to go with him to watch the Rose Bowl Parade at his condo in Pasadena that overlooks the parade. I just replied, “oh yeah that sounds cool, but I doubt I’ll go because I have work that day,” but thanked him for the invite.

Let’s move on to this past Friday. His cousins girlfriend came in for another haircut. She asked me if I was dating John. I laughed and said no, he’s not my type. Well she tells me that the 1st time she came in, he told her that he and I  were dating. He showed her pictures of me, hair that I’ve done and even showed her pictures of my kids. I was super upset and weirded out by it because I don’t post pictures of my kids on my Facebook and Instagram. So I don’t know how he got a hold of pictures of my kids!!! Then she goes on to tell me that he’s been telling people that we are engaged!!! Anyways come to find out he’s not only just told her and his family but he’s told this to other people!! I got a hold of my old friend who was like my brother growing up. He told me that John was telling him that he and I dated back in the day and that John owes him over $1500 for rent and my friend kicked him out for doing drugs and that things had gone missing while John was there, like guns!!! So the guns he was talking about and showing us the pictures of were all stolen!!!

I don’t know what to do!! Do I say something to to him? Do I let it it go??

One thought on “I have a boyfriend and didn’t even know it

  1. This is potentially dangerous for you and your children. Tread lightly and carefully. You have reason to believe John is a thief, a liar, a drug addict and a pervert. Worst of all he has stolen firearms and an unhealthy fascination with you, which he has held on to for years. I don’t think you should confront him outright as this could set an unstable person off. I would slowly separate yourself from him. If you have to talk to him, keep the conversation meaningless and short and don’t give him any reason to pursue you. With any luck he will just go away. Please stay safe and keep me posted.

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